Freedom day 2

Today started a morning at 6am plus. I got woken up by the buses and traffic noise. I am a light sleeper.

Decided to get up, and immediately started to arrange my desk, my guqin table and fans. After sweating out an hour, did my usual routine of preparing breakfast and toilet washing. Tried an oufen breakfast but the amount is not substantial. Took my new medicine for my cough.

After that, rest abit and started doing my baobao for LG. Did three quarters way before I felt tired. It could be my meds. I heated up my wraps and just ate 1 for lunch, and I just threw myself on my bed and ko-ed.

Woke up to my dogs barking. Can't be bothered to wake up then finally around 2pm, woke up and made coffee. Now in a clearer mind, continued watching my YouTube.

While looking through some YouTube on china job market,  felt very down. I actually should be grateful, my dividends can give me a 2k per month passive income. Count my blessings that 我说走就走. Life is about living.

Freedom day 1

Yesterday was a hard day. Manged to survive the depart without tears in office. Teared outside, and not in front of colleagues.

Bought snacks for IT, and own depts. Left them quietly at the pantry.

Cleared some emails and then for lunch, we dabao mee from Redhill stall at united square. Went L8 for ktv. Thought that when I go back, I could leave. Cos I didn't want any card or gifts. But my colleagues still bought me gifts. Haiz they still arranged for swensen buffet today evening. They gave me a Fitbit charge 6 and cosmetic. Have to use it.

Must have cost a lot.

Anyway I know why I am leaving. I can't turn back my decisions.

Cried abit at home. Well only my dogs know. Didnt have good sleep as I woke up 1am and tossed and turned till 4am. Slept for 3 hours - moved back to my study room to sleep with door open. I think the heat and stale air made it difficult to sleep in master bedroom.

Today only wanted to go see doc, call lawyer Tang and go eat buffet. 

Tears

I wanted to blog, but posted blog in old blog instead.

Went to read my old blogs, it detailed our starting. I argued with him constantly, over small things, turning against my family for him. I had flashes of memories because there were many meltdowns. 

No point looking back, cherish your happy memories - those msia trips we made. 

We went msia, Vietnam, china, Taiwan, Hong Kong, cruise :) no regrets. You only live life once. I am happy being able to bring him to these places. I have done what I could within my capabilities.

You only have now.

Friends

W is going for a one year masters study in Spain in Sep. We decided to meet for a meal, a bit of a celebratory one to celebrate my last work day and W new education journey.

I booked sun with moon at Wheelock, lunch was fully booked. Woah lucky I made a booking in advance via messenger.

We ate lunch - the variety was there. Vegetables, eel rice, it was a nice portion. Ate desserts too. Next we walked around a bit before walking to tcc at shaw. Have drinks and more food.

Haha as we age, we just want to sit down and drink or eat. None of us want to shop - our wants are so low. 

We talked so much. W has quit last jul, and she said the first thing is to slow down and just enjoy the moment. Told her about my plan to focus on exercise and running. She shared about her hiking experience.

We also talked about how we want to live if told we die soon, or within one year. We just want to spend time with love ones, and won't change anything else we are doing. Life is short. I don't know I have. She talked about her father anxiety about death. For me, I wish my death is swift. That is all I wish for. No prolonged suffering for the sake of suffering. I am very more concerned about the quality of life than just living.

If I am at my deathbed, I will miss drinking a warm cup of coffee, eating chocolates, chips, walking around and feeling free. Wind blowing on my face and hair. Going to toilet myself. These are things I have, but never have the mind space to admire and appreciate.

You only live life once.

Received my last pay

I received my last pay yesterday. This marked the end. The end of my journey with this company I worked 14 years 3 months for. 

As I mentioned earlier, while I have issues with the company, I am also grateful to this company. My colleagues, bosses, ex bosses, they believed in me.

This job allowed me to buy a house, owned cars, have two dogs and reached FI. I must not forget this. 

On the other hand, it gave me sleepless nites, anxiety, drained me of my life.

Regardless, this is a chapter of my life that would end on coming tues. Documenting my thoughts.

Yesterday had weird dreams about a male colleague. I hope I am not overthinking because I really feel nothing. 

I have promised my hubby before I will not remarry. I will fulfill this promise. I do not need a guy to come and change my life. My life is in my hands. I shall give myself the love, courage to move onwards to my second chapter. Barista FI.

老公在天之灵，会祝福和支持我的。我很相信这点。

4.5 more work day

One more exhausting day.

Wfh today, as still having cough. Cough is manageable if not talking.

Tmr to thurs will wio. Fri, next mon and tues is half day.

A few things to do, clear my cabinet tmr. Have a good lunch with my IT colleagues.

Cancelled term insurance

Was sick for past week - coughing like mad.

One more week or to be precise 6 more working days to my freedom day.

This week, I have cancelled my AIA cancer guard. The premium almost doubled to 72 from 40. Considering I have a 150 cancer cover which cost 90, I thought it was not worth to continue paying 72 for 80k coverage. My remaining AIA cancer cover term plan would only get more expensive as I age, so decided to cut down on my whopping 650 monthly insurance over.

I also cancelled my pruvantage term insurance that cost 90 a month for 500k term coverage. I still remember how I got this policy, it was because when I bought my Bukit Pangjang Blk 427 flat, a financial adviser called me saying he can share a plan that I would no longer need to worry about insurance later on. Pigued, I went to meet him. Then upon meeting him, he went one huhh circle drawing me diagrams and saying how this plan would help me. End up what he was suggesting, was buy a term insurance equal to 500k (my flat value) then next time I upgrade my house, I will continue to be covered.

I was rolling my eyes. Cos I had been an agent before, and had bought term insurance before, what he was saying is not really some new thing. Anyway I told no harm to buy more term since I thought if any 3 long 2 short happens to me, YS need monies. So I bought.

When I reviewed my own insurance recently, I realized my house is already covered by hps, not full but a long percentage. If I dies, my house is practically free, my sisters can sell them for a good amount. Plus my CPF monies, investments, and remaining term insurance of 200k, this is easily 1.5mil. They are well provided for.

My only worry is if I get cancer, and I won't have monies to pay for my medical expenses. But I already have 150k aia, 100 fwd and prushield premier, I should be able to pay. If I tio kidney failure, my prushield should be able to pay for that. So I die die have to keep my prushield extra that is a whopping 177 a month. Shot up from 126. I intend to cancel my AIG next. This will cut my insurance costs to 377 (excluding AIG).